Monday, March 20, 2006


If you can't use detainees for paintball target practice, then what fun is starting wars?

In the windowless, jet-black garage-size room, some soldiers beat prisoners with rifle butts, yelled and spit in their faces and, in a nearby area, used detainees for target practice in a game of jailer paintball. Their intention was to extract information to help hunt down Iraq's most-wanted terrorist, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi.

al-Zarqawi: the ultimate Paintball opponent!

Placards posted by soldiers at the detention area advised, "NO BLOOD, NO FOUL." The slogan, as one Defense Department official explained, reflected an adage adopted by Task Force 6-26: "If you don't make them bleed, they can't prosecute for it."

Once again, our stellar Defense Department has found a loophole in the Geneva Conventions!

The story of detainee abuse in Iraq is a familiar one.

Well, sure - if you read the New York Times!!!! If you get your information from NRO or Paintball Magazine or any of several other credible news sources, you'd know that Iraqi orphanage construction is up 1,420%, yoga classes are being taught at Gitmo, and Dick Cheney recently received a large fruit basket and a 2006 Anne Geddes calendar as a gift from the people of Iraq. It's amazing what those elite New York liberals call "news."

Speaking of the Vice President, here's something to keep in mind if you ever end up sitting next to him in an Energy Task Force meeting, at a GOP fundraiser, or on Meet The Press:


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